How It All Started

So here's how it all began. On New Year's Eve, my wife Lorren and I were discussing New Year's resolutions - and realising we hadn't got any. Nor could we think of any that we were likely to keep for longer than a few days. Well, they're so difficult, aren't they? You must do this or mustn't do that - and one slip and that's it for the year. Besides, we've used up all the obvious ones in years gone by. Finally, after much "amicable" discussion on the topic ("How about you resolve not to bitch about taking the bins out more than twice a week?" "Great idea - and you could resolve to, I dunno, occasionally turn a light off after leaving a room"), Lorren recalled something she'd read about a man who'd recommended doing away with New Year's Resolutions altogether - and instead of lumbering yourself with a personal vow that you're unlikely to be able to keep, just promise to be nice to someone every day. Not to be nice all the time, or to everybody - just once a day, do something that brings a smile to someone's face. Nothing special, necessarily. Maybe just letting them have your seat on the train, or making them a cup of tea, or even just paying them a compliment. Just something that makes someone's day a bit brighter. And then hopefully they'll go on to do something nice for someone else, and so on. A whole chain reaction of niceness.

This hit a chord with me. I'd just been reading a story on the BBC news website about a writer, Bernard Hare, whose life was turned round by the action of a good Samaritan - a ticket collector on a train, no-one holy or special, who'd gone out of his way to do an unasked favour for a stranger in distress, for no other reason than it was the kind thing to do. You can read the story at http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-12043294 if you want. It's not long, and it's rather inspiring. And so Lorren's suggestion got me thinking.

Being nice to people. Now there's a really revolutionary idea. Not all the time, just once a day. I could do that. We could do that. Hell, even Joe Stalin could probably do that. But could we do it every day for a whole year - perform 365 random acts of kindness? Although, as there's two of us, then that's actually - let me see - 730 random acts of kindness, if you get my drift. But 365 is snappier.
We start to discuss the parameters. Just what is it that constitutes a Random Act of Kindness (or an RAK as we've already started to call it)? We agree that it has to be an act without any promise of a reward. Nor should it be motivated by anything ulterior (like, say, fancying the person we're performing it for, for example). It can't be a response to something that's been asked for (eg "Can you get me a cup of tea?"), and it shouldn't be something you'd normally do anyway (like cooking the supper when it's your turn). It shouldn't be something that has to be done anyway, like tidying up the kitchen, and it shouldn't really be something that's designed for your own comfort. Blimey, this is getting tricky. That counts out most of the stuff I do all day.
Further points we agree on. We can't go out specifically looking for an RAK to do, they should just happen during the normal course of our day. We can't just do the same kind thing every day (because apart from anything else, that'd make an exceptionally boring blog). Oh yes - forgot about that. We agree to blog it, so people can track whether we've managed to keep it going. And we agree to report to each other about the RAK we've performed, to keep each other on our toes. By the time we'd finished all the rules, I'm beginning to think keeping a normal New Year's Resolution would have been a piece of cake compared to this.
Anyway - here's the blog. I'll try to update it every day so you can see how we're getting along. feel free to comment on it, especially if you think we're getting slack or breaking the rules. I'm personally intrigued to see how far we can go with it. Hope you are too.